Confessions of a neurotic mother

Since becoming a mother, my mind is doing this awful thing to me. It goes to the darkest of places in the blink of an eye. Seemingly normal every day scenarios I find myself in cause my mind to drift to possible things that could happen, and then manifest into bad things happening, which then manifest into what I would do in that situation to protect Trent, and then my stomach gets in knots and I either feel physically sick or I actually feel a little angry. I think I've become a worrier!!! I never used to be.

Yesterday my train of thought went like this:

My ring sure is sparkly... Hmmm, maybe I should put it in the safe deposit box during our trip in case I lose it.... but what if something happens? nobody will be able to get it from the safe... what would happen to it if I die? who would get it? not some crooked rescue worker ripping it off my cold dead finger... I'd want Trent to have it... what if the plane crashes? ...OMG! Trent's so young and has so much life to live! (visual of plane crashing and me trying to protect him) what could I do to help him get out of it alive? (nausea). STOP IT! You're being crazy!

See what I mean? that's just one very mild example. Obviously I have some anxiety issues. Specifically around Trent's wellbeing. I wonder if every parent feels like this or if I'm unusually neurotic. I struggle every day to keep a balance and not be over protective. Every morning when Trent gets in the car, in the very back of my mind there's a tiny fleeting thought that wonders if that's the last time I'll see him. How horrible is that?? And I kiss him and tell him how much I love him many, many times before he can get into the car. Every time I buckle him in, I make sure the top buckle is as far up as possible so he wouldn't get ejected from his car seat in the event of a crash. And every morning I check to see if Brian's logged in so my mind can rest easy that they're both ok.

Jeez. I need some Valium or something.